After eight hours of yoga training the other day, I “grounded” by watching an episode of Project Runway. During this episode a talented designer, Samantha, lost the runway challenge.
The pain she wore on her face reflected more than the loss. She knew she didn’t leave it all on the runway. She held back, dumbed down, played it safe. Her losing design wasn’t something that genuinely reflected her talents as a designer.
Her immediate response was, “Self-doubt, it’s really always been the thing that’s held me back. I held back because I was scared they wouldn’t get it.”
She dumbed her vision down because she was afraid it wouldn’t have been accepted.
How often have you found yourself in that situation?
You have a brilliant idea. You’re excited about. Maybe even a little bit scared but in a good way. And then… your inner critic jumps in and tries to convince you to ditch it, to go back to what’s safe, to “get real.”
The moment your fears arise is the moment you have an opportunity to own your power.
I remember early in my blogging days wondering when the fear would go away. When I was posting a blog, for example, the old critical programming would surface. I wondered what was wrong with me, why I was so weak, and what it would take to overcome those fear-based feelings.
Everything changed when I read this quote by Elizabeth Gilbert in her book Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear.
Trust me, your fear will always show up—especially when you’re trying to be inventive or innovative. Your fear will always be triggered by your creativity, because creativity asks you to enter into realms of uncertain outcome, and fear hates uncertain outcome.
I realized in that moment that my fears might never go away. That I’m not the only person experiencing fear as I think about going bigger, sharing myself more, showing up differently.
It’s actually something we all go through. AND…
I have the power to relate to those moments of fear, doubt and temporary insanity differently.
Samantha wasn’t the only one on Project Runway who doubted her vision and wondered if others would accept it. I bet every designer had moments of that.
What was different was how they responded to those moments of doubts and fears. They didn’t allow their fear to rob them of their vision. They noticed the fear and stayed their course. They created their vision.
Which is exactly what Liz Gilbert goes on to explain. She shares that a method to her success is to find a way for fear and creativity to co-exist. Because when we try to kill our fears we often unintentionally kill our ideas.
It isn’t that successful people don’t have fears and doubts. They simply learn to respond to them differently.
Many of my original fears related to blogging, etc., have disappeared, but when I’m stretching myself in some new way, they show up. What’s different is how I respond to them. It’s not a surprise. It’s not a sign of weakness or failure.
I don’t give them any more meaning than they deserve. I don’t race about why they’re showing up. I see it’s simply some part of me trying to protect myself.
I consider it my job to let those fears know, hey, I see you, and I see what you’re trying to do for me, but I got this. Because in those moments I have a choice to make: work through the fear or be paralyzed by it.
I make the choice. I pull out my trusted methods for helping me bust through my fears, and I get to work.
Because I’m worthy of that, and so are you.
So now it’s your turn…
- Where is your fear or self-doubt getting the best of you?
- How is that holding you back? Keeping you stuck?
- What is it costing you? Others?
- Are you ready to try something different?
If yes, join me for a webinar I’m hosting on Tuesday, Wildly Worthy: Empower the Worthy Woman Within. It’s jam-packed with info to empower the badass woman within you who has ideas, dreams and desires, but maybe has been holding herself back.
>>> Click here to register for the Wildly Worthy Webinar. While a recording will be available, I’m giving away an awesome prize on the live webinar! Don’t miss out on your chance to claim it!!
During this webinar you will learn:
- the top three blocks that are standing in your way of feeling greater worthiness
- key behavioral patterns and beliefs that are keeping you stuck (and what to do about them!)
- proven ways to elevate your confidence and worthiness so you can go bigger, feel happier and own the amazing woman within
